Saturday-Going Home!

Outstanding news, we get to go home!! MK has met all the requirements this morning to be sent home. We are not sure what time we wil get out of here but will just be glad to get home.

-Bradley

My Wife Is...

MK has battled endometriosis for two years. She has had six surgeries. My Wife is a fighter.

MK has put herself through so many tests, medication changes, procedures, and numerous broken hearts in an attempt to find a way to become pregnant. My Wife is selfless.

MK is a true nurturer and loves to care for others. My Wife is going to be a great mother.

MK has researched every option that is out there to treat endometriosis and infertility. My Wife is smart.

MK has enjoyed watching and being a part of her friends' lives that have either recently had babies or are currently pregnant. My Wife is compassionate.

MK has never given up. My Wife is resilient.

MK has just completed the "ultimate surgery" to hopefully get rid of her disease. My Wife is strong.

MK knows the Lord and accepts His plans for us. My Wife is a believer.

These are but a few of the reasons My Wife is my hero.

About 2 weeks ago, MK was unsure of having this surgery. She would call me daily asking me if I thought she was making the right decision. One day I was bringing her lunch to the office when Martina McBride's song "I'm Gonna Love You Through It" came on the radio. From that moment on, I knew whenever MK had doubts or concerns, my response would be "I gonna love you through it". While the song deals with breast cancer, it just seemed to sort of fit us. Endometriosis has been described "cancer-like" in regards to the way it spreads and the discomfort it causes.

To My Wife: I promise to continue to love and support you. You are my hero and I'm gonna love you through it.

Friday Mid-Day Update

Yesterday MK, her parents, and I all enjoyed a nice meal dropped off by two of MK's friends. Our room has been brightened by a couple beautiful floral arrangements and we received a wonderful gift basket full of all sorts of treats. MK was able to get up a little yesterday evening and take a sponge bath.

Last night was a little tough with a low grade fever and the sweats. Having a difficult nurse last night didn't help much either.

Today, started with discomfort for MK but was finally taken care of with the help of the epidural. MK was able to eat some breakfast and is looking forward to lunch.

On a different note, I sure wish our "care team" would get together and communicate about MK's care plan. We have been told at least 3 or 4 different plans regarding the removal of the epidural, switching to oral pain medications, and possible discharge date. I am note sure who is in charge of MK's care at this point because all the different Dr's involved are contradicting one another. It makes us a little uncomfortable when we have one group of Dr's here and we tell them what the other groups have said and they just look at one another in disbelief. I believe I might bill UAB $75 per hour to mediate between these groups. Who knows when the epidural will come out, when MK will start oral meds, or when we will return home. I guess I will simply enjoy my expanded dining choices while here in the big city.

-Bradley

Thursday Mid-Day Update

MK is doing well today. Last night was smooth with the exception of the constant interruption of the nursing staff. We know it is required and we appreciate the sincere care. Today MK has been resting comfortably. We have been well cared for by the Dr.'s, residents, interns, nurses, and our private nursing student. UAB is a top notch facility. We have been very impressed. -Bradley

MK is in a Room!

We have just gotten MK settled into a room (room 7219). We are in the Women and Infant Center located on 8th ave and 18th Street. If you pull to the main entrance you can use the free valet parking (regular parking fees apply). Proceed to main desk on 1st floor to check in and get a visitor badge. Then just take elevator to 7th floor and use intercom to gain access to patient rooms

Surgery Is Over!!!

SUCCESS!!!!! Dr. Estes said surgery went GREAT!!! He said while she had severe endometriosis, he believes he was able to get most all of it. He completed a total hysterectomy (ovaries, uterus, cervix, and tubes) but didn't have to resect the bowels or intestines. She is expected to remain in post-op for another hour or two then we wil be transferred to Women and Infant Center. We will be on floor 7 but don't know a room number. Discharge looks like Saturday or Sunday. I have full confidence that God has worked though this UAB staff and MK is on her way to reclaiming a healthy life. Thank you to each and everyone for the continued thoughts and prayers. I am just elated with the positive response we believe MK has had. -Bradley

Finally Surgery Begins

At 11:10am, MK was finally taken back to surgery. Dr. Estes is very positive regarding the expectation of the outcome In our present location, I have very limited cell phone service, so I apologies for the limited updates. Bradley

Waiting For The Fun To Begin

After a sleepless night, we arrived at UAB just before 5am. We had been instructed that this was MK's time for admission. After waiting more than an hour, MK was registered. Now it is 7:15am and she just got called back for surgery prep. Hopefully soon the "fun" will begin. Bradley

"Bless Her Heart, She is so Young" (Surgery Scheduled)

“Bless her heart, she is so young.” This is the response that I get when I tell family, friends, and others that my 27 year old wife is having a total hysterectomy this Wednesday. After 5 difficult surgeries, it has been determined that Mary Kathryn’s reproductive system is causing too much discomfort and trauma to her body. Furthermore, it was discovered in December that her ovaries were functioning like a 40 year olds. Even with an oophorectomy (removing just the ovaries), the chances of having a successful egg donor transfer and carrying a pregnancy to term are very slim. We also have concerns that leaving any part of her reproductive system would lead to future cancer.

MK has given a lot of thought and prayer into this decision. If I tell you it has been difficult for her, I would be understating things. MK is very strong, but she is giving up the part of her body that is the very symbol of a woman. She is doing this so that she will finally return to good health after 2 years. She is also preparing to care for the child God has provided for us through a future adoption. She calls me daily in tears telling me that she can’t do it. She knows very well that God has a plan for us and that we will have a family, but it really hurts her knowing that this surgery will be the “final” surgery and will unfortunately eliminate any future chances of becoming pregnant. MK is very strong in the fact that she can even make this decision but greatly needs everyone’s support. She very much needs everyone’s understanding of the emotional and physical side effects of the hysterectomy.

The surgery will be performed at UAB’s brand new and beautiful Women and Infant Center by a specialized Gynecology/Onocologist. Why an Onocologist? MK’s disease, endometerosis, grows and spread in a similar fashion to cancer. Her doctor has the expertise to perform very detailed surgeries of this nature. This surgery will be considered a major surgery and will require at least 3-4 days in the hospital. Depending on how wide spread the disease has become, the doctor may have to rebuild parts of MK’s large intestine. In this event, her hospitalization would be doubled.

Please keep Mary Kathryn, our team of doctors and nurses at UAB, and myself in your thoughts and prayers. We are set to arrive at UAB this Wednesday (1/25/12) around 6am with surgery hopefully beginning around 9am and last several hours. I will try to keep everyone up to date via the blog, email, text, or phone calls. Thank you so much for your love and support. We could not continue our journey without it.

-Bradley

"When God Closes One Door He opens Another"

I'm sorry that we have not posted in awhile, but not much has been going on until this week. After I recovered from my last surgery I went back to see my fertility doctor. She told me that my ovaries were not functioning and that I had another cyst. She said that our only option left for me to get pregnant was egg donation.

After that day I felt like my doctor had done everything that she possibly could for me. I decided to get a third opinion from the infertility department at UAB. I was very surprised when I called to make an appointment and they said we can get you in tomorrow. I thought to myself "It's got to be meant to be." I was so glad that Bradley was able to go with me. As we sat in the exam room waiting on the doctor to come in I kept telling Bradley that I was so nervous. Now, If you know me then you know that I competed in Miss Alabama for several years. I competed during the time that Deidre Downs won Miss America. Let's just say that she was my role model and I looked up to her for years and still do. I knew that Deidre had just graduated from medical school and that she was doing her residency in OBGYN.

All of the sudden the door opened and Deidre walked in. I was speechless. She told me that she was doing a rotation with Dr. McLaren. After everything that I have been through I couldn't have been happier to see a familiar face. I immediately relaxed because I knew I was in good hands. So at this point I knew that God had sent me to UAB for a reason. I later got to meet Dr. McLaren and she was wonderful. She did some lab work and wanted to see me back in a week.

I went back to see Dr. McLaren on Monday and again the news was not was I was hoping for. Again, I was so nervous about hearing the results. She told me that based on test that she did my ovaries are not functioning and from the looks of my pelvic area she doesn't think that I will be able to carry a baby to term. As I sat there and cried I knew what was next. It broke my heart, but I looked at her and said "it's time to move on...I'm ready for a hysterectomy." She said that she honestly thought that it was the best way to stopping my pain.

She said that this surgery is going to be major and that she wants to do it within the next month.  I'm nervous and scared, but I know I'm in good hands. I'm going to have an endocrinologist, OBGYN and an oncologist performing my surgery. I have been to three doctors now and they have all said the same thing. I have been devastated since Monday, but in a way I'm relieved because I want have to worry anymore.

We are going to start the adoption process after my surgery. Right now, I'm extremely sad because I don't understand, but I know that years down the road I am going to thank God for the precious child that he is going to give us.

Please keep us in your prayers as this is just as hard on Bradley as it is on me.

God has closed this door and I know that he is about to open another.

Mary Kathryn

10/25/11--2-Week Post-Op Follow-up Appointment

Monday, 10/24/11, MK had her 2-week post-op appointment. Her plans were to go in and get a timeline/game plan on what our next chapter would be. Oh, yeah, she also needed to get a medical release to return to a full work schedule.  

She recounts her first "real" question for her doctor to be "was is as bad as you thought?" referring to the surgery. His response, "it was horrible." MK said she kind of laughed thinking he was being slightly sarcastic. "No, really, it was horrible" again states her doctor. We had known it was bad from her very first surgery but none of the previous doctors had quite taken this descriptive approach.
 
He then goes on to tell her that he had a recent medical conference in Las Vegas (of course I Googled and think he was referring to the "International Pelvic Pain Society's Annual Fall Meeting" last weekend). He said different doctors submitted cases and pictures of surgeries, etc., to be used in the meetings and presentations. He said he was watching a presentation when pictures came up on the screen that seemed familiar. He kept looking at them and approached the presenter afterwards. His thoughts were correct...the slides were from MK's surgery! Best part is that the discussion was basically looking at "worst case scenario" of Endometriosis. As I stated in my closing sentence from the last paragraph, we have known her case was severe but, oh my, MK has been diagnosed with one of the worst cases of Endometriosis in America. Now MK being a pageant girl, she is all about titles, but not this one!!

 Let's look to our future. MK's doctor has said that we need to quickly go back to our fertility specialist and devise our new game plan. So that said, MK has made an appointment next week to discuss with our fertility doctor our options. We have a preliminary belief that we will be limited to IVF and egg donor. The IVF won't have great odds and we are still developing our opinions on whether we believe egg donor would be a proper fit for us.  Of course, we will discuss and consider all options available to us.

I was unable to attend this follow-up visit. I really didn't think that much about it. When MK called me after she left the doctor's office and was telling me about everything, I was shocked. She was being very strong and collected on the phone, but I can only imagine how this news was affecting her. I even had to step out the back door at work to have the conversation.  Now, MK is the strongest woman I know. Not many people, men included, could go through the daily pain and discomfort she is faced with.  I can't imagine my life without her and I am blessed to be by her side through all of this.  As I have said before, this is my disease just as much as it is hers.  She is not alone in this.  I would give anything to help alleviate her pain but I have to stay focused that this is working through God's plan. All I can really do is stay positive, support her, and maybe do the dishes, vacuum, wash clothes, etc., to help her out! We will get through all this through our Faith and support from our wonderful friends and family. As MK has quoted from one her favorite books recently, I firmly believe everything will be worth it when we can look at our "little one" and say "If our journey had been easy, we wouldn't have you".

Thanks for listening,

 --Bradley

10/10/11--Surgery is Over

MK came out of surgery doing pretty well. It was around a 3hr surgery. Herdoctor is very optimistic that the work he performed will help her with her daily pain. We had entered this day thinking he might remove her left ovary and left tube, instead he was able to leave them both in place. He did however remove her right tube. He said it was so swollen with infection he consulted with our fertility doctors and they agreed it needed to come out. He was able to remove several "nodules" of endo throughout her pelvic area. The doctor also found several small cuts in her bladder caused by the endo that is certainly causing her additional discomfort.

I think he was shocked to see first hand how rough MK has had it. He even referred to her aggressive case as to the way cancer might "attack" the pelvic area.

We will wait for now to learn about the impact the success from this surgery will have and our fertility. Until then, we place MK's healing and recover in the hands of our Lord.

For those who have expressed and interest in stopping by the hospital, we are still here overnight and MK will be discharged sometime Tuesday. If you would like the room number, it should be available on patient directory or you can email, text, or call either my phone or MK's (I will answer)

Thank you to everyone who has been thinking of us and praying for us.

--Bradley

10/10/11--Let the Surgery Begin

MK was rolled back to surgery around 8:45am. If all goes as planned, she should be out sometime around noon. MK's final request prior to going back was to listen to the Auburn Fight Song on her iPhone. 

--Bradley

10/06/11 Surgery Rescheduled!

Sorry, that it has been awhile since our last post, but it has been a lot of waiting to see what our next step will be. Hopefully we haven't posted too much in one day. We have a lot to be thankful for and a lot of catching up to do!  It has been very emotional because it is like riding a rollercoaster. One minute you are up and the next you are down. 

My surgery has been rescheduled for this coming Monday (Oct. 10^th). We are hopeful that this surgery will improve my quality of life as well as provide us some answers on how to pursue having a family. They will keep me overnight and then release me sometime on Tuesday. After that I am hoping for a speedy recovery.

Until then - Bradley and I are looking forward to a wonderful weekend. Tomorrow, I’m so excited that I get to keep my good friend, Mary Catherine’s, little baby Anna Scott. This will help to take my mind off of my surgery. Then Saturday hopefully we will cheer Auburn to a victory.

-Mary Kathryn

10/06/11--Friends and Motherhood

On a happy note – I am truly blessed to have such wonderful friends in my life and I love every minute of  watching them become mothers. I love watching Anna Scott (Mary Catherine’s little girl) grow, I was so excited this week when I found out that Anna is having a little girl (Lucy Reeves Beam) and I can’t wait to find out what Maggie is having. These girls will never know how much their continued love and support have meant to me.

I read something yesterday that really gave me peace and I wanted to share it –

“We know we’ll have a baby. And we’re going to have the baby we’re supposed to have. Whatever baby we end up having will be the right baby. Our baby. And we know that we’ll hold that child and think, “If our journey had been easy, we wouldn’t have you.”
                                                                                       Baby Proof by Emily Giffin
                                                                                      (May 15, 2007)
                                                                                   

-Mary Kathryn

10/06/11--MK's Experience in the ER

When things are hard we tend to focus on the negative instead of the positive. A week ago, I ran into a full length mirror and severely cut my toe. I had to go to the emergency room at 5:30 in the morning and get 15 stitches. When this first happened I asked God, “Have I not been through enough?” However, on that day, God showed me that I have so much to be thankful for. I have a wonderful husband who came to my rescue and took care of me. He took care of me all weekend. I have wonderful parents who, when I called to tell them I was going to the emergency room, my dad dropped everything and came to the ER to be with us. My mother brought me my favorite “chocolate covered pecans” and a pair of house shoes because I couldn’t wear regular shoes.

I also focus on the negative at work a lot of times, but yesterday when I was in an award ceremony sitting by my dad and I saw him give a thumbs up to one of his employees, who had just received an award, my first thought was “Why can’t I have a supervisor like that?” and then I realized that I might not have a supervisor like that, but I have a dad like that and that is worth so much more.

--Mary Kathryn

I would like to add that MK is all the time bumping into things around the house.  She has plenty of bruises to prove it.  When she started screaming last Friday morning, I thought nothing of it.  But when she started to cry, I sprung into action because I knew it wasn't a simple bruise.  When I turned the lights on in the bedroom, I was horrified at the amount of blood all over the carpet.  This is when all my years of Boy Scouts kicked in (I am proud to say that I am an Eagle Scout!) and I was able to handle the medical emergency very well.  I think I shocked MK at how calm but demanding I was during the ordeal.  I have to give a shamless shout out to my parents for being so heavily involved with Scouts, especially since it isn't the "cool thing" for kids to do today.  As proof on this day, it really pays off. 

I love posting pictures but I think I will refrain of posting one of MK's toe.  I don't want anyone to loose their meal.  Who knew that her little toe had enough room for 15 stitches?  On a football related note, her ER physican at RMC in Anniston was a former team doctor for Alabama during the Bear Bryant days.  All I could say about his professionalism, bedside manner, ability to stitch, and the stories he shared, is RTR.

-Bradley

09/23/11--Surgery Postponed

I wanted to drop a quick note that MK's surgery that was scheduled for Monday has been postponed.  After the doctor who will be performing the surgery conferred with her fertility doctor, it was decided to wait for surgery. 

More to details to come!

-Bradley

Issue with Posting Comments Corrected 09/22/11

I have recently learned that several people has attempted to post comments on our blog with out success.  I just went through the "settings" page and found the ability to post "restricted".  I apologize to everyone for the issue and have not set it to allow anyone to post a comment.  I hope this works.  If not, shoot me or MK an email, text, or call and I will look further into it.  You can choose "anonymous" to avoid setting up an account or registering.

Thanks again for the interest into our journey and the support and love we feel.  We couldn't make it through this difficult journey without our Faith, family, and friends.  God Bless You All.

-Bradley

09/22/11--Surgery in the Future

Sorry it has been a few days since our last post.  MK had to meet with her doctor in order to develop a new game plan since IVF wasn't succesful for us.  As it turns out, the plan is for another laproscopic surgery on Monday.  Yes, this Monday, September 09/26.  We are set to arrive at Brookwood Hospital at around 4:30am.  Why do they insist we arrive so early?  We won't go back until 6, 7, even maybe 8am!!  At any rate, he Pelvic Pain Specialist will be performing a 3 or more hour surgery to attempt to clean out ALL the endometriosis for her entire pelvic area.  He is also planning to remove her left ovary and left tube.  We have suspected for quite some time that her left side is causing a lot of trouble getting pregnant, but mainly, it causes her a great deal of pain.  In fact, the doctor equated her level of pain to that of a cancer patient!  Due to the extensive nature of the surgery, we will have the pleasure of staying at Brookwood Monday night.  This will ensure that MK's pain and discomfort can be properly managed as well as the fact that after this surgery, it will likely be difficult for her to move around.

Thank you to everyone for their continued support, love, and prayers.  As I have with the last surgery and the one before that, I pray that this will be MK's last.  I sincerely pray that this surgery will remove all of her pain and suffering.

-Bradley

Day 10 09/17/11--Our Door Through IVF Has Closed, But We Know God Has Other Doors Open

Today was not a great day for us.  We had gone into the doctor's office at 7:30am with the hope that MK's follicles had grown to the needed size and quantities.  Well, they had grown but not large enough and not enough.  This means we no are no longer candidates for IVF.  This has been pretty devastating to us.  We always knew there was a very real chance that IVF would not be successful, we just never imagine not being able to complete the cycle.

So, what does all this mean?  Well, we actually have numerous options.  For the immediate future, option 1, would be to switch from IVF to IUI.  Intrauterine Insemination (IUI) is basically a procedure of placing sperm into the uterus.  Option 2, is to let nature take it course over the next couple of days.  We have taken all the stimulation medications we can.  Now we can attempt pregnancy with out additional help.  We also have many more options for long term success.  This requires several doctors collaborating to develop the best game plan possible.  We are really too early in the process to discuss the options with great knowledge or understanding.  Just know this, we aren't giving up!!

For whatever reason, IVF is not the method of success for us.  As the door has been closed on IVF, we look forward to turning to God for answers on which door to open next.  When we were in Birmingham Thursday, I was reminded of a scripture in the office of one of MK's doctor's "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you" (Jeremiah 1:5).  This gives me great comfort knowing that God knows our plan and already knows who our child is long before we do.

Thanks for all the prayers so far.  Please do not give up as we have not given up.  We still have a long, emotional road ahead of us and we need all the help we can get.

Again thanks,

Love,
Mary Kathryn and Bradley